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Amadeus Cost Reduction Plans Announced

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08th December 2008

Posted by Ace Farkin

As a result of the slumping world economy Amadeus, a global provider of airline IT solutions, announced a 10 point plan to reduce costs and ensure its viability for millenniums to come.

The company announced its plan, called “10 Steps Sideways” at a company meeting in Tahiti, attended by all 8,300 company employees. When questioned about the cost of bringing every employee to such an exotic site to announce a cost reduction plan, Executive VP of Corporate Businessspeak Jose Luis Garbanzo de la Vega responded it was necessary “to ensure employee buy-in, streamline synergistic relationships, embrace bricks-and-clicks functionalities, and cultivate viral schemas.”

The flagship of the cost reduction plan is a radical change in the Amadeus corporate branding. Currently branding dictates that a person or part thereof, appears in every ad, brochure, or presentation slide. Rather than hiring all those young, globally hip looking models, Amadeus has signed a co-branding agreement with Jack-in-the-Box to use their ping-pong ball headed spokesperson. Amadeus will, of course, call him Jacques.

“This co-branding agreement will save the company significant expense, and allow us to continue to provide natural lemon rinds in the employee café for the 3PM espresso breaks” continued de la Vega.

When asked if the new agreement meant that Jack-in-the-Box would begin providing meals at company cafes, de la Vega was too horrified to answer.